Unjust Deity
by Lightning-Dono
Summary: Hades wants to be God of Pretty Women, so he declares Persephone Goddess of the Underworld, runs from Zeus, only to discover that he can only survive in darkness...


**Lightning-Dono**: After doing a unit on Greek Mythology in class, I thought I'd write one on the gods. o.o The first chapter basically describes Hades life at the moment and introduces his personality since I took some liberties with it.

Unjust Deity 

**Disclaimer:** The Greeks made the characters. –nod-

_What do you mean Hades doesn't want to be God of the Underworld?_

-

A man of many names sat on his obsidian throne, hand resting idly on Cerberus, his multiple headed dog. All three heads today were devoid of emotion as they protected their shadowy master. The stagnant air, filled with the heavy emotions of those tortured under the rule of Hades, made it harder to breath. The second head lowered it's jaw, stuck out it's tongue, and panted.

Had the muscular, fearsome man had a choice, he wouldn't be sitting around watching the plants wither around his castle and Persephone goggling at the load of jewels he had to offer to her today. Hades would rather have been skinny-dipping in the River of Styx, running laps around the old man endlessly pushing a rock up hill, and wooing the woman before him, swaying back and forth with a sort of laggard grace.

The only reason he had for sitting around on his butt today was that he needed to wait for someone. Hades was awaiting judgement from Zeus, in which Zeus (Whom Hades referred to bitterly as 'God of All') would decide whether the grotesque, bearded god would be able to rule over something else. Hades was tired of breathing in air that smelled like it had been finally released after being trapped in a rotting coffin for hundreds of years. He was tired of watching Persephone turn her lightly bridged nose at the personal stash of gold he had that he was generously offering her. Although watching the people who stood there for eternity suffering was fairly amusing, you can't have too much of a good thing. It got rather boring after a while. Especially after playing host to nonentities who had suffered regicide beseech to him to bring them back to life. He may as well have a convention, invite them all, and scream to them through a megaphone, "I CAN'T BRING THINGS BACK TO LIFE, DAMMIT!" He was the god of DEATH, after all.

-

"I'll be going to visit my dear brother Hades, now," Zeus called, shaping his hair accordingly using a sap that held it in place.

Hera, who was resentful after hearing of Zeus' many affairs, snorted in a dismissive manner and turned away from him momentarily before glancing back to make sure Zeus wasn't going to hang her in the sky again.

Good-mannered, Zeus zoomed down to the Styx, eager to see Persephone once more.

-

"At last!" Hades growled menacingly as Zeus approached the graphite-colored throne. "What was the delay? I thought you might have," Hades smirked, "drowned in the Styx."

"Now, now, is that how to greet your brother after all this time?" Zeus questioned, trying to keep his voice from fluctuating in anger. "I believe you wish to rule over,"

"The pretty women."

Zeus' eye twitched insanely; something even a powerful god couldn't prevent, especially when faced with such a statement. He regained his supremely elegant composure.

"Oh, but my dear brother, I believe that,"

"There is no god for pretty women!" Hades thundered. "Only single women and other such things! I want PRETTY women!"

"But you have Persephone!"

Hades' eyes were reduced to slits as he gave Zeus his famous 'death glare' that gave mortals nightmares and the dead chills. "Persephone is not," he thought about saying that she wasn't pretty enough, but the god before him would probably pop like a stabbed balloon. "as pretty as those...other women out there. You would know, wouldn't you, Zeus?" Hades' eyes twinkled maliciously.

Zeus huffily resigned to the steps, sitting down on the first one, facing Hades. "Then who will care for the Underworld? Those people...They need a leader! You must stay!"

The god wearing a ragged piece of cloth prissily pretended to stare at his nails that were streaked with lavish amounts of dirt.

"Persephone can be their leader."


End file.
